I Guess the Phils Have No Chance
Oct 28, 2009 in Phillies
I’m not one for pre-game analysis and predictions. In fact, I fucking hate them. I saw dyed-hair douche tits AJ Pierzynski today on that abortion of a show “ESPN’s First Take” and they asked him what it would take for the Yankees to win the series. After dropping his pants, slobbering all over himself, rubbing his genitals over glossy pictures of Derek Jeter, and performing mock simulations of how he will perform oral sex on A-Rod after the Yanks sweep, they asked him the same question regarding the Phillies.
His response: “Well, I have to admit I’m trying to figure out a way the Phillies have any chance in this series and I really can’t think of any.”
This coming from a major league player who has won a world series ring in the past 5 years. Awesome. Hey ESPN, for your next segment why don’t you have one of your interns take a huge shit in the toilet and ask its opinion on next year’s Kentucky Derby. The point here being, no one is picking the Phillies to win. Yea you might hear some analysts say it will go 6 or 7 games, but they’re all picking New York.
Phillies Fans, I implore you to turn off all pre-game shit, stop reading experts picks, and forget about it all. Nobody knows what will happen (except Biff from Back to the Future). Obviously no one has watched the Phillies play all year. Apparently too many people were watching the Yankees to notice a team that is probably better than them. It’s cool because even when the Phils ‘shock the world’, it will be because New York didn’t play well. The only way the Phillies will get any credit is if we win every game 15-3.
You moron Yankees fans seem to have a short memory (see Florida Marlins 2003 World Champions).