City of Pain

This just in:  The Sixers continue to sodomize weaker opponents.  Andre Iguodala continues to throw down massive tomahawk dunks that are so ignorant they make Dick Vermeil cry.  Lou “Snake Eyes” Williams and Thaddeus “Fudge Python” Young seem to have no ceiling in terms of ability.  Andre Miller may talk like Michael Jackson but he can dish out assists easier than a 12 year old girl can gain access to a Mark Chumura Hannah Montana themed birthday sleepover.  Anybody seen my pajamas?  And why is there a hole cut out of the back of them?

It’s gotten to the point where you look at the schedule and you see the Sixers beating 85% of the teams coming up.  Phoenix?  Win.  New Jersey?  Win.  Cleveland?  Another win.  At this point the only things that can stop the Sixers are a terrorist attack on the hotel they’re staying in, a team wide STD outbreak (most likely stemming from a Reggie Evans Popsicle party), SARS, and of course Chuck Norris. 

Who wants to play these guys right now?  Step on up.

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