City of Pain

so we got this guy chris snelling from the rays for cash (cigar money?). then i go on wikipedia and what do i find.

“He was often compared to Lenny Dykstra due to his aggressive play and inability to stay healthy.” you mean like “He has been injury-prone during his eight years in professional baseball. Snelling has had 10 surgeries, seven of which were on his left knee. He originally hurt the knee in 2002 by tearing his ACL while trying to stop at third base.”

he seems to inspire great devotion from mariners fans which i guess is a good thing. and pat gillick as well since he was the one who signed this guy as a free agent from australia.he can’t possibly be worst than chris roberson, so that’s a plus. he’s a 26, he was the mariners #4 prospect not the long ago. and billy beane had a man-crush on him and we could use some more creative, moneyball-type thinking in this town.

i mean look at this shit. i’m getting aroused if this is half true:

=== Dr’s Prognosis: 6-7 runs per game ===The report below contains our take on Snelling’s ML profile: a very nice RC/27 of 6.0 or 7.0.He’s going to eventually post an OBP near .400, and his lefty gap power will play well at Safeco. Don’t kid yourself — Chris Snelling can hit home runs. We’ve watched him at Cheney. He pulls mistake pitches, pulls them consistently, and he pulls them hard. He’s got pop.If Snelling stayed healthy and got 500 AB’s in 2007, he’d probably hit 20 home runs, and lots of doubles. When Snelling gets his pitch, seriously, you can hear the “SMAACCCKKK!” all the way to Fife.This guy vaporizes 2-0 pitches, and he vaporizes them to straightaway RF. Chris Snelling has at least as much power as Raul Ibanez.

=== Become One With The Ball, Grasshopper ===One last thing: from an aikido standpoint, Chris Snelling’s state-of-mind is unsurpassable. There isn’t a player in the minors or majors, including Ichiro, who has a superior focus and attitude in the batter’s box. Especially remarkable is Snelling’s “ki extension” —the practice of opening up, out into the pitcher’s intentionality, and reading the pitch as early as possible.If a frag grenade went off in the RH batter’s box during the pitcher’s wind, Snelling wouldn’t notice until he was trotting around the bases with shrapnel in his backside. What a boxer he would be.

so we got this guy chris snelling from the rays for cash (cigar money?). then i go on wikipedia and what do i find.

“He was often compared to Lenny Dykstra due to his aggressive play and inability to stay healthy.” you mean like “He has been injury-prone during his eight years in professional baseball. Snelling has had 10 surgeries, seven of which were on his left knee. He originally hurt the knee in 2002 by tearing his ACL while trying to stop at third base.”

he seems to inspire great devotion from mariners fans which i guess is a good thing. and pat gillick as well since he was the one who signed this guy as a free agent from australia.he can’t possibly be worst than chris roberson, so that’s a plus. he’s a 26, he was the mariners #4 prospect not the long ago. and billy beane had a man-crush on him and we could use some more creative, moneyball-type thinking in this town.

i mean look at this shit. i’m getting aroused if this is half true:

=== Dr’s Prognosis: 6-7 runs per game ===The report below contains our take on Snelling’s ML profile: a very nice RC/27 of 6.0 or 7.0.He’s going to eventually post an OBP near .400, and his lefty gap power will play well at Safeco. Don’t kid yourself — Chris Snelling can hit home runs. We’ve watched him at Cheney. He pulls mistake pitches, pulls them consistently, and he pulls them hard. He’s got pop.If Snelling stayed healthy and got 500 AB’s in 2007, he’d probably hit 20 home runs, and lots of doubles. When Snelling gets his pitch, seriously, you can hear the “SMAACCCKKK!” all the way to Fife.This guy vaporizes 2-0 pitches, and he vaporizes them to straightaway RF. Chris Snelling has at least as much power as Raul Ibanez.

=== Become One With The Ball, Grasshopper ===One last thing: from an aikido standpoint, Chris Snelling’s state-of-mind is unsurpassable. There isn’t a player in the minors or majors, including Ichiro, who has a superior focus and attitude in the batter’s box. Especially remarkable is Snelling’s “ki extension” —the practice of opening up, out into the pitcher’s intentionality, and reading the pitch as early as possible.If a frag grenade went off in the RH batter’s box during the pitcher’s wind, Snelling wouldn’t notice until he was trotting around the bases with shrapnel in his backside. What a boxer he would be.

From rotoworld.com

Rollins won even though Holliday was first or second on 29 ballots, six more than the shortstop. That’s because first-base votes are valued at 14 points, to nine for second-place votes. Rollins had 16 to Holliday’s 11 and won by 17 points. Had first-place votes been scored at 10 points, Holliday would have won. Behind Rollins (353 points) and Holliday (336) in the voting were Prince Fielder (284), David Wright (182), Ryan Howard (112), Chipper Jones (107), Jake Peavy (97), Chase Utley (87), Albert Pujols (50) and Hanley Ramirez (49).

Yes, you in the back, calling me a lying turd.

Trying to get the true side of the story out of Phillies Management is like trying to pry information out of a five year old that just shit his pants and swears he doesn’t know how it got there. You never believe them. You can see (or in this case, smell) the lie from a mile away. One of the biggest off season questions for the Phillies and their fans has been the status of third base. We we’re told by David Montgomery immediately after the Phils were swept out of the NLDS that the Phillies needed to ‘upgrade at third base’. To every Phillies fan that has suffered through the lowlifes we’ve put at the hot corner since trading Scott Rolen in 2002, this was music to our ears. Reading over the names that have worn the candy red pinstripes at third base since the departure of Mike Schmidt is almost as depressing as reading over the names of those who died on 9/11. It’s beyond nauseating. Do we need to be reminded about signing David Bell and his genital warts ridden 4yr/ $17 million dollar contract after hitting a phenomenal .261 with the 2002 San Francisco Giants? Does the thought of Wes Helms give you ‘Nam flashbacks? Do you start to hate the world, your country, your children and parents….yourself, when you think of Tomas Perez? It’s not as if they haven’t had their chances to make a slight improvement in recent years, it’s just that they didn’t.

Should they have made Placido Polanco their full time third baseman after trading Rolen away? Yes.

Should they have removed the crack pipe from Ed Wade’s grimy, weasel mouth before trading Polanco instead of cutting your losses on David Bell? Yes.

Was Wes Helms really the best off season option last season? Probably not, although they only signed him for two years.

On average, since 2002 have the Phillies had the worst overall offensive stats at third base in the NL? It’s not even close. (see below, courtesy of philliesflow.com)

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which is very different than my initial thought when i heard that the phils had offered the man $50 mil over 4 years. my thinking was “he’s old, this year was a fluke, and you’re paying the world series mvp tax (which is nowhere near as misguided as paying the super bowl mvp tax).”

the numbers say i’m wrong. let’s look at mike lowell vs. everyone’s favorite injury risk, aaron rowand (especially in regards to yearly statistics that throw off your perception of a player). thanks to the nerds at baseball america for the numbers. i’m considering lowell over the last seven and rowand over the last four. i don’t have the patience to find out why rowand’s AB’s were so low prior (platoon or injuries, i think)

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